One of the things I’ve come to love about wordpress, so far, are the search terms people use that have them ending up here, reading this blog.
Yesterday someone was curious if Ben Affleck wore a hair piece, and so they typed it into some search engine and ended up here.

I don’t know why. To my recollection, I’ve never talked about Ben Affleck or hair pieces before.

But if you’re here because you’re curious if Ben Affleck has a hair piece, I don’t want you to go away empty headed. Okay that was cheap. Empty handed.

So, for the next three minutes, ala Encyclopedia Brown, i’m going to do my damndest to find out, for you, if indeed Ben has plugs, a wig, or a comb-over.

First, let’s figure out what exactly a hair piece is. Back in the 80s they had hair club for men. As a kid I always assumed that Sy Sperling was some sort of president of a bad swimmers association. Besides, that was some sort of chemical treatment. We’re talking about hair pieces here. Those furry things, like the sasquatch, that are rarely seen by man. For the record, this is the closest thing to a real hair piece i could find.
Next, we’ll examine Ben Affleck. Here’s a picture of Ben in the dugout with the Boston Red Sox. Right away you’ll notice that his hair is covered by both a hat AND a hoodie. Hmmm. Why both? You could argue that someone with a hair piece would go such lengths as a hat and hoodie to cover up the fact they have a hair piece. After all, should the hood fail, he has a back-up hat.

TIMES UP.

With the evidence we’ve found, Mr. Affleck may indeed be covering something up. However, there are too many bald spots in this story for any solid conclusions – and thus, this entry should be deleted.

PostScript: October Ten, 2006.

It seems that this Ben Affleck thing is so old news that someone was talking about it back in 2002.

Advertisements